Thursday, 11 December 2008

What do they say about life and lemonade?

So here's something I doodled a while ago. Apologies if it doesn't make sense. If it does, just send me a hug...I could do with one right now.


Sometimes I feel I am in the middle of an ocean on a dinghy little raft, holding on to it for my life, while all around me I have roaring waves threatening to overturn the raft any minute. I don’t know swimming, and all I seem capable of doing is to pray for non-existent help. Can only a miracle save me in this situation? I don’t know what to do to better my chances of survival. But surprisingly, I am not all terrified or miserable. Sure, I don’t know what will happen the next minute, but I am doing what I believe is the best I can do at this particular minute...and that is to pray to God for strength! Yes, just for strength so that I hold myself together in this ordeal.

I am no coward, and I took this chance to venture out into the ocean, and now that I face a near-fuck-it-all situation, I am going to be brave and face it with my head held high. Deep down I know I did my best to avoid this fuck-up, and now that I am in here, I confess I don’t know what to do. There doesn’t seem to be any help at hand. I take one minute at a time; I don’t know for how long. If I am sure of one thing, it is this that if I have to go down, that will be with the knowledge that I ain’t a coward.

Back

I am back to the blog after a very long time. Lots happened during this break, the lessons of which I am still trying to understand.
I was going through some of my old folders today, and found this gem of a poem. This has often given me strength in times of despair, and today was no different. So here I am posting it for myself and for anyone else who could do with a little pat on the back. Go on, drink from it...

The Invitation
by Oriaha Mountain Dreamer

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring the moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your sorrow, have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed for fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself, if you can bear accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul.

I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it is not pretty everyday, and if you can source your life from it's presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver of the full moon...YES!

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done for the children.

It doesn't interest me who you are or how you came to be here. I want to know if you can stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me what or where or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in empty moments.